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The Girl Next Door Screeching Weasel White girl living in the big city In a big apartment house She's living with her boyfriend now She drives off every day for school and work She washes dishes now And watches tv on the pull out couch Surf Goddess (Ben Weasel / Joe King) Screeching Weasel It could have happened to anyone but it happened to me I fell in love with a west coast girl an amazon in ripped jeans Looking out at Lake Michigan wishing that I was there She's hanging ten out in Hollywood STUPID GIRL Screeching Weasel stupid girl i've had enough of all of your whining stupid girl i've heard enough of all of your crying don't scream at me and get all mad he's the one who treats you oh so bad stupid girl i understand SAD LITTLE GIRL Screeching Weasel Your smiley face is out of order today everything's wrong and you can't shut it off just stop resisting you'll never change anything start sharpening yourclaws don't try to live the way that you want Burnout Girl (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel I walk by your house while you're laying in bed Thoughts of rescuing you race through my head I'd rip my heart out of my chest and hold it for you to inspect and while the blood dripped down our hands THRIFT STORE GIRL Screeching Weasel Well she's a thrift store girl Yeah she's a beautiful loser She'll switch price tags for me Sometimes meet me for coffee And I don't think she does that For anyone but me She dresses me for absolutely GUEST LIST Screeching Weasel I was hanging out at the show feeling like a fat potato I don't know what I'm doing here I saw her at the door and she looked as bored as me so I got her in I put her on the guest list at the show WAVIN GERBS Screeching Weasel I was there alone one day Me, Fred and my microwave Fred was a gerbil just the same I was feeling quiet insane 60 seconds set on high Kiss my gerbil Fred goodbye Watch old Freddy run and run He Something Wrong Screeching Weasel Another night another town another gig Another day of F.R. asking what the frig? Time Bomb (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel Joined at the hip again with him tonight You're almost invincible aside from all the nods and smiles but I know that You're gonna blow up 'cause you're a time bomb All set to go off you're a time bomb WHAT IS RIGHT Screeching Weasel What is right (x4) Gotta lot of people don't like my attitude I don't know what the fuck I should do If you think it's OK when I rip in a song Then why when I do it to you is it wrong I gotta I LOVE TO HATE Screeching Weasel Love to hate I love to hate Deck the halls with Sharon Tate Love to hate I love to hate Assasinate, decapitate I need a dog that I can kick I need some to make me sick The girl that fills me with 99 (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel I think of you every minute of just about every other day It's funny but the tv dosen't seem to make my thoughts about you go away Every time I think of you I start to follow clues can't call you from ASHTRAY Screeching Weasel I can't pay the rent, the 20 bucks I made last week's already spent The landlord's at the door and there's dried beer and cigarette butts on the floor Can't seem to go to work and let some fucker DINGBAT Screeching Weasel she's a dingbat Her dumbness really bothers me Brainless questions constantly I wish shut her mouth, give me a break Oh God I hate her face She lives alone in her own world Naive wide-eyed little girl Mary Was an Anarchist Screeching Weasel Mary was a girl with a cause she was simply fed up mary moved out to berkeley and stuck pins her face as a sort of statement against oppression of her sex mary took a walk in the park with a sign SUPERMARKET FANTASY Screeching Weasel I went through the automatic doors My shopping cart ran in to hers Our eyes met for a second, then she turned away And after just a little while I went in to the canned goods aisle And there she MORE PROBLEMS Screeching Weasel You were once a nice suburban girl Until mom and dad gave you their special love You wanted to tell them something personal But the exact words you couldn't think of So you cut and dyed your hair HANGING AROUND Screeching Weasel everybody else it's getting harder to remind myself of what I've learned relying on anotherlame religion to validate our arrogant traditions and any day we're gonna wonder why we've been left behind this girl Degenerate (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel In your beady eyes I don't make the scene Well your right if being part of your teenage soap opera's what you mean Degenerate degenerate Encapsulated with all the other creeps In another lame quest to THE HUNTER Screeching Weasel God's creatures carcasses Laying all around Some stupid hick shot them all down Not for food, not for life, just for fucking fun I can't wait to see the day when animals carry guns, when animals MAD AT THE PAPER BOY Screeching Weasel MAd at the papaer boy that little nerd Can't throw a paper straight, the spastic twerp Hit me in the head with the Daily Sun Then he laughed like a maniac, the smart ass runt Mad at the paper boy HOLY HARDCORE Screeching Weasel Holy harcore jesus christ Knocking our religious life Live by Crass, die by the sword We're punk rock servants of the lord You say that all you want is peace The Bible preaches anarchy You say THE SCIENCE OF MYTH Screeching Weasel If you've ever question beliefs that you hold you're not alone But you oughtta realize that every myth is a metaphor in the case or Christianity and Judaism there exist the belief that spiritual matters MURDER IN THE BRADY HOUSE Screeching Weasel Bobby Brady's dealing crack - Marcia's on the pill Mike's in bed with Alice + Sam sells dog chops at his meat shop Greg is trying on garter belts and Peter spent 3 nights in jail Murder in the Brady EXPERIENCE THE OZZFISH Screeching Weasel I got a call last night from Warren Somebody told him his band is boring Warren was crying, he felt so bad Cause the punks don't like his bell-bottom pants Experience the Ozzfish (x2) I went The American Dream Screeching Weasel Oh say can you see the star spangled banner flying can you see everyone holding hands and brightly smiling well I see rioting and I see bodies in the streets in the future of the american dream I YOU BLISTER MY PAINT Screeching Weasel i don't know what you're doing to me but i don't think it's the way it should be and i don't know what i'm doing i don't know what you're doing i don't know why you're picking on me but i know that's Planet of the Apes (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel Planet of the apes you're a primate Planet of the apes you're what I hate This orangutuan is a one man gang a big fat ass baboon Planet of the apes you are so wrong Planet of the dinks here comes King You'll Be in My Dreams Today Screeching Weasel I don't think that i'll ever forget the way you looked tonight forever in my mind I gave you stolen flowers and you gave me your last cigarette you'll be in my dreams today you showed me your new tattoo