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If I Was You (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel So if you were in my shoes you're saying that you would basically have it made Well if I was in your boots I'm telling you I would be making things my way I'd take what's mine if I was you You'd never Degenerate (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel In your beady eyes I don't make the scene Well your right if being part of your teenage soap opera's what you mean Degenerate degenerate Encapsulated with all the other creeps In another lame quest to 99 (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel I think of you every minute of just about every other day It's funny but the tv dosen't seem to make my thoughts about you go away Every time I think of you I start to follow clues can't call you from Surf Goddess (Ben Weasel / Joe King) Screeching Weasel It could have happened to anyone but it happened to me I fell in love with a west coast girl an amazon in ripped jeans Looking out at Lake Michigan wishing that I was there She's hanging ten out in Hollywood Burnout Girl (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel I walk by your house while you're laying in bed Thoughts of rescuing you race through my head I'd rip my heart out of my chest and hold it for you to inspect and while the blood dripped down our hands I Wrote Holden Caulfield (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel I loved you for the minute when you decided to tell me the truth I heard you and that night I cried for you I know that you're alone just like everyone else in the world Don't tell me that things don't Time Bomb (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel Joined at the hip again with him tonight You're almost invincible aside from all the nods and smiles but I know that You're gonna blow up 'cause you're a time bomb All set to go off you're a time bomb Planet of the Apes (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel Planet of the apes you're a primate Planet of the apes you're what I hate This orangutuan is a one man gang a big fat ass baboon Planet of the apes you are so wrong Planet of the dinks here comes King I Hate Your Guts on Sunday (Ben Weasel) Screeching Weasel I hate your guts on Sunday no other day of the week I hate your guts on Sunday but Monday morning you look so sweetI hate your guts on Sunday and I'm not even sure why 'cause I love your guts on Friday Nobody Likes You (Ben Weasel / Danny Vapid) Screeching Weasel Nobody likes you you are such a drag Nobody likes you you are such a brat Nobody likes you you see Nobody likes you not me Nobody likes you you're ugly dumb and mean Everyone hates you pass the Dramamine CLAIRE MONET Screeching Weasel Claire Monet I heard someone say It's been so long since the last time I heard her name I learned a lot from her Yeah she was singular The one day she got married That's the last we saw of her Outside Of You Screeching Weasel so this bad joke comes to an end i can't believe that we were friends i don't know what you think about me do you really think that you're superior to me outside of you is where i'll be outside of you's HANGING AROUND Screeching Weasel I walked around alone last night and tried to look at people like I did backthen I kinda wanted to just hang out remind myself what it was all about abouteverything I thought I shattered and left laying WHAT IS RIGHT Screeching Weasel Gotta learn soon that things never last Cause I'm a punk rock christian with a bug up my ass Gotta know now if it's all worth a fight Cause if there's really a god then what else is right ? ZOMBIES Screeching Weasel You left me there at the shopping mall You left me standing All I had was some potato chips, a can of warm beer, and a face full of zits Then a barrel full of slime rolled over me I was burning THE SCIENCE OF MYTH Screeching Weasel If you've ever question beliefs that you hold you're not alone But you oughtta realize that every myth is a metaphor in the case or Christianity and Judaism there exist the belief that spiritual matters I WANNA BE WITH YOU TONIGHT Screeching Weasel I just know your name but still just the same I see you in my dreams at night I see you in my food when I eat I see your pretty mug I think that I'm in love If you kissed me I would blow up If you STUPID OVER YOU Screeching Weasel Madonna I'm in love It dosen't make too much sense But when I saw you on TV This sounds so ridiculous But I can't help the way I feel When I look at your chubby face Sandra I don't understand SOCIETY Screeching Weasel I can't stand your right wing phonies I don't like you congress cronies You spend your days at shopping malls You buy guns 'cause you don't have any balls Society makes we want to puke (x2) I WAS A HIGH SCHOOL PSYCHOPATH Screeching Weasel I realy hated high school it was such a drag everytime I walked the halls allthe kids would call me a fag I dodn't care for physical ed and I didn't care for history I wanted to blow up my high school CANCER IN MY BODY Screeching Weasel I know that they're inside me Waiting to multiply And I want them out of there I've got a butcher knife I'll keep cutting 'til I find them 'Cause I want them out of there I don't care if you don't LEATHER JACKET Screeching Weasel I wanna tell you what's on my mind And i wanna bill you for wasted time And wasted cigarettes that quenched your fix And wasted spit I left there upon your lips I'm getting used to the fact you I WILL ALWAYS BE THERE Screeching Weasel you keep on trying too hard to make something work out you're so afraid of your own loneliness and doubts i've had to stand by so many times while you got burned and i hope somneday you'll finally It's Not Enough Screeching Weasel things are getting worse it's not working out everything is coming up upside down nothing ever changes it's a stupid waste and i give up it's not enough people say tomorrow's another day if that's true Celena Screeching Weasel Celena looks at me and asks me if i know what's on tv and now she wants to know what's wrong with me and why I allways have to be so mean. PANIC Screeching Weasel A voice inside my head is screaming Metaphorically I mean I'm certainly not crazy I don't think I'm all that crazy But you see this pressure's getting to be Just a bit too much for me I'm feeling NICARAGUA Screeching Weasel I don't give a fuck about nicaragua I don't give a shit about the President I don't care about suburban white kids Trying to show they've got compassion Politics are boring Politics are fucking ONE STEP BEYOND Screeching Weasel It seems to me you shut out anything that might confuse the warped and twistedvisions of the narrow little paths you choose we're all potential converts inyour eyes I think instead you need to take PHASERS ON KILL Screeching Weasel what to do a spaceship crew came crashing through my house captain kirk the stupid jerk punched me in the mouth why'd you pick this place you came from outer space if you're sleeping on my couch SUPERMARKET FANTASY Screeching Weasel I went through the automatic doors My shopping cart ran in to hers Our eyes met for a second, then she turned away And after just a little while I went in to the canned goods aisle And there she