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Your Mother & I Loudon Wainwright III Your Mother & I are living apart I know that seems stupid, but we weren't very smart You'll stay with her, I'll visit you At Christmas, on weekends, the summertime too Your Mother & I are not getting along Between Loudon Wainwright III Between the forest and the ocean lies a lonely strand The ocean is your mother, and the forest Fatherland. Father/Daughter Dialogue Loudon Wainwright III [Martha] Dearest Daddy with your songs Do you hope to right your wrongs? Clockwork Chartreuse (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III You got the black belt, I got the gun. Let's team up tonight--have some fun. Let's drink some drinks, find us some fights. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon: it's Saturday night! I Can'T Stand Myself Loudon Wainwright III I sure can pick 'em Out looking for my next victim Who will that unlucky one be? Westchester County Loudon Wainwright III I was raised here in Westchester County I was taught in the Country Day School We were richer than most, I don't mean to boast But I swam in the country club pool With a father from Hewlett, Long Island Primrose Hill Loudon Wainwright III dirty old sleeping bag And this mangy dog Whose tail don't wag Sun's been shining down On my hillside bed That's not the only reason My face is so red This nasty cut on my nose Is not from no fight I What Are Families For? Loudon Wainwright III Your mother's loose, your father's slim She smothers you, you bother him Passed back and forth between those two Until they've had enough of you Another bundle comes along But by this time something's Thanksgiving Loudon Wainwright III communication's useless Don't let me drink too much wine Lord you know how I get ruthless Let us somehow get through this meal Without that bad old feeling With history and memory And home cooking we're Bein' A Dad Loudon Wainwright III hauled up Before a tribunal for dad crimes Bein' a dad (bein' a dad) Bein' a dad (bein' a dad) Bein' a dad can make you feel sad Like you're the insignificant other Yeah right from the start They break your East Indian Princess (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III East Indian princess lives in a western dream Happy like a child, her mother is a queen You know she's safe as a cow on a Calcutta street This English way of life has got that other life beat And reading Four Mirrors Loudon Wainwright III I've slumped in your chair Tossed and turned in your bed Lurked in your lair I have lived in your head Where others were closer No one is nearer As I glimpse you in me In the hallway mirror I've grabbed Sometimes I Forget Loudon Wainwright III Sometimes I forget that you've gone You've gone, and you're not coming back And it's hard to believe that you're still not here What's left behind, disputes that fact And your bookcase still holds all Five Years Old Loudon Wainwright III ice cream I guess you'll be a mess Five years old, Five years old Five years old, Five years old Be nice to all your pals, and cousins Remember they're your guests Share the fun with your big brother Down Drinking at the Bar Loudon Wainwright III Well, I call you up on the phone: nobody's at home. Then I do my usual thing: I let the telephone ring and ring and ring. I'm standing at a phone booth, coping with the ugly truth. Say That You Love Me (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III Told you I love you Talked on the [Incomprehensible] You'd said that you like me, feel like a fool Say that you like me, that's not enough Say that you love me, I'm calling your bluff Say that you love A Father And A Son Loudon Wainwright III When I was your age I was just like you, And just look at me now; I'm sure you do. But your grandfather was just as bad And you should have heard him trash his dad. The Doctor Loudon Wainwright III that olden crowd Living's a battle and you're losing the fight I went to the doctor and the doctor said Boy, your body is a temple, it's not a toy Fill up this here paper cup and give it to the nurse Kick In The Head Loudon Wainwright III Well I hear that she told you she'd been shacking up with your best friend And the kick in the head is she said that she wants to again Well they was kissin and huggin and doin it right in your bed Oh Ogm Loudon Wainwright III Your new outgoing voice Sounds bright and brave and very clear now In those seconds you recorded it I guess that you felt free I started out my message With a pause that I aborted When I addressed you Come A Long Way (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III We've come a long way since we last shook hands Still got a long way to go We couldn't see the flowers since we last shook hands Couldn't see the flowers on account of the snow What did you do with your Lullaby (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III Shut up and go to bed Put the pillow under your head I'm sick and tired of all your worries Shut up and say goodnight Say your prayers and turn off the light I'm sick and tired of all your sob-stories Number One Loudon Wainwright III Of all the chicks & broads & babes & bimbos I have known No one does it better than you do on the phone Midway through my busy day all through my empty night I dial your 900 number and it feels oh so right Grown Man Loudon Wainwright III He is the king, ruling the kingdom's his thing; Just remember his mother is queen. Sometimes he fools around when he goes out of town But sooner or later he's bound to get caught. Underwear Loudon Wainwright III You know when I know just how much I care When I'm carefully folding your clean underwear I see it's all worth it though sometimes it sure hurts Putting back in the bureau drawer all my t-shirts I find Breakfast In Bed Loudon Wainwright III Well I wake up in the morning And I can't get out of bed You're lying in there with me We stay put instead I grind the beans, squeeze the juice And butter up the toast That takes about an hour Ninety minutes You Never Phone Loudon Wainwright III You never phone you never write Hell I stopped hoping that you might You`re trying to hurt my feelings right You never phone you never write You never write you never phone I`m sorry to bitch and moan Talking New Bob Dylan Loudon Wainwright III Hey, Bob Dylan, I wrote you a song Today is your birthday if I'm not wrong If I'm not mistaken, you're 50 today How are you doin', Bob? What do you say? Unrequited To The Nth Degree Loudon Wainwright III Oh when I die and it won't be long Hey you're gonna be sorry that you treated me wrong Yeah you're gonna be sorry that you treated me bad Hey and if there's an after life I'll gloat and I'll be glad Might The Untitled Loudon Wainwright III Oh when I die & it wont be long Oh you're gonna be sorry that you treated me wrong You're gonna be sorry that you treated me bad And if there's an after life I'll gloat & I'll be glad Might be a plane