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What Gives Loudon Wainwright III caftan of Mama Cass' Rock and roll will never die, neither can her heroes Just pick a figure with three digits Then tack on about six zeros The Beatles are forever, it's like John never got shot Here's what What Are Families For? Loudon Wainwright III She forgets to take a pill Overload is overkill What... what are families for? A Song Loudon Wainwright III you see it it'll sound okay You bet there'll be a video We'll flesh it out for radio Now it's high time that I play that change again It's haunting you like an annoying friend It's true that you like what You Never Phone Loudon Wainwright III feelings right You never phone you never write You never write you never phone I`m sorry to bitch and moan I`m sorry to pick this bone You never write you never phone Sometimes I wonder ow wow ow wow ow wow What Come A Long Way (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III We've come a long way since we last shook hands Still got a long way to go We couldn't see the flowers since we last shook hands Couldn't see the flowers on account of the snow What did you do with your Down Drinking at the Bar Loudon Wainwright III Because I know what you are. You're at sot, that's what you are. I know what you are. You're a lush. You got a big red nose! I know where you are, baby. I know where you are... Cobwebs Loudon Wainwright III thirty years now Just to give my cool quota just a little bitty kind of a boost But when I hear it I can't stand it Especially coming out of the mouths of one of my own kids It's been taught and, God, What Muse Blues (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III You know I eat, drink and I smoke stuff I don’t know what to do I went to the mountain and the desert too I was there ladies so where were you I’m a flattened out wave, I ain’t got any curl I’m an empty Happy Birthday Elvis Loudon Wainwright III It isn't true, you didn't die, No matter what they say. The colonel just decided You should drop out of sight After the Bicentennial The timing was just right. The World Loudon Wainwright III the world is a sandwich of shite Every day you take another bite You think you're Superman Sure you can handle it 'Til you come across kryptonite Chunky style The world is a sandwich of shite alright What Number One Loudon Wainwright III oh so right When I'm feelin lonely and bottled up inside I know I can aslays take that magic carpet ride I get down on my bearskin rug on my loving room floor I get you on the telephone & you give me what Father/Daughter Dialogue Loudon Wainwright III You can't undo what has been done To all your daughters and your son The facts are in and we have found That basically you're not around Dearest Daddy try as you might All you are is just uptight You sing Tonya's Twirls Loudon Wainwright III From the wrong side of the track, she liked the boys more than the girls, With their gliding and their sliding and their girlish dainty twirls-- And it seemed like she was lying, about what she didn't The Picture Loudon Wainwright III You were looking at my paper, watching what I drew; It was natural: I was older, Thirteen months more than you. 1994 Loudon Wainwright III There's been a brand neew breakthrough Though they're not sure what it means We used to blame our parents Now we can pin it on our genes Hey and I'm not talking 501's I don't mean no pair of pants I'm Dilated to Meet You (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III We're wondering when you will arrive We're wondering what you'll be We're wondering if you'll be a her Or if you'll be a he Maybe you'll arrive today Perhaps tomorrow night We're hoping you won't hurt The End Has Begun Loudon Wainwright III would have ended up at The end has only begun Well the day Tonight feels like a million miles away And these times just won't change Life just stays the same I'd give anything to see the light of day What The Shit Song Loudon Wainwright III then their eyes well up with tears Then they pronounce me looking great I haven`t changed a bit I flash `em back a feeble smile I know I look like shit `Cos I saw myself this morning phew and I know of what Sometimes I Forget Loudon Wainwright III And there was something I wanted to tell you so bad Something I knew that you'd want to know I could go by myself to our old haunt That seems like such a strange thing to do The waiters would wonder what A Father And A Son Loudon Wainwright III I think I know what you're going through; Everything changes but nothing is new. And I know that I'm miserable; can't you see? I just want you to be just like me. Primrose Hill Loudon Wainwright III them a thrill Yeah I see you Riding by on your flash bicycle Yeah they can do you for that on Primrose Hill A pretty young mother goes by She's pushing her pram Her little baby leans out Just to see what Between Loudon Wainwright III You're in between your whole life long what happens when you di-ie? Down below is Mother Earth, your father dwells on high. So Damn Happy Loudon Wainwright III more pain At least I should feel slightly crappy But the sad thing is I'm so damn happy And the worst thing is it's so much better That admission would upset her But it's true and it's beyond belief What Men Loudon Wainwright III right Men kill men in uniform, its the way war goes When they run they're cowards, when they stay they are heroes Every man's a general, men go off to war The battlefields a man's world, cannon fodders what Y2k Loudon Wainwright III lotta that It can boot you up, it can load you down With that little bitty mouse you're gonna rule this town But you're headed for trouble I do believe It's coming your way on New Year's Eve now Whoa what Suddenly It's Christmas Loudon Wainwright III When they say 'Season's Greetings' They mean just what they say. It's a season, it's a marathon Retail eternity And it's not over til it's over And you throw away the tree. Breakfast In Bed Loudon Wainwright III shoulder late last night I mean to say I'm hungry But it's not for food When I'm on your empty stomach It must mean I'm in the mood Just a couple of consumers Every morning me and you We keep consummating What Conspiracies Loudon Wainwright III Angels talk to shepherds Wise men troop after a star And a Virgin has a baby Boy that's fetched pretty far But we adults buy that conspiracy We toe and swallow that old line Disappearing milk and cookies What The Doctor Loudon Wainwright III Oh, I went to the doctor I went to the doctor and the doctor said Sir we got back the x-ray everything's a blur It's all positive that's what every single test shows I went to the doctor and the doctor Something For Nothing Loudon Wainwright III get paid for my work but I`m a fool Because trading and sharing`s so awesome and cool I don`t mean to be flip I don`t wanna be pat And those Metallica guys are all getting too fat Free information yeah what