The Man Who Couldn'T Cry Loudon Wainwright III

There once was a man who just couldn't cry He hadn't cried for years & for years Napalmed babies & the movie 'Love Story', For

New Paint Loudon Wainwright III

At the station you can meet her With that smile you couldn?t cheat her A woman that kind is hard to find It?

Over The Hill Loudon Wainwright III

Once you were a young man, But now you are old - you're over the hill. And you can't cross the palm of time's hand With silver and gold to make him stand still.

The Man Who Couldn't Cry (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

There once was a man who just couldn't cry He hadn't cried for years and for years Napalmed babies and the movie love story For instance could not produce tears As a child he had cried as all children

4 X 10 Loudon Wainwright III

strange, no mystery you and I are history I put up my protective wall it's 4 feet thick and 10 feet tall 10 feet tall and 4 feet thick granite, concrete, steel and brick protection for you, understand the

The Home Stretch Loudon Wainwright III

If the day off doesn`t get you Then the bad reviewer does At least you`ve been a has been And not just a never was And you know it`s not a mountain But no mole hill is this big And you promise to quit

Grown Man Loudon Wainwright III

You got a grown man for a boyfriend, So you better treat him just like a baby. He's a saint on Sunday, he's a bum on Monday; The rest of the week he's just crazy.

Men Loudon Wainwright III

When a ship is sinking and they lower the lifeboats And hand out the life jackets, the men keep on their coats The women and the children are the ones who must go first And the men who try to save their

The Shit Song Loudon Wainwright III

When I run into friends of mine I haven`t seen in years They give me the once over then their eyes well up with tears Then they pronounce me looking great I haven`t changed a bit I flash `em back a feeble

Dead Skunk Loudon Wainwright III

Crossin` the highway late last night He shoulda looked left and he shoulda looked right He didn`t see the station wagon car The skunk got squashed and there you are You got yer Dead skunk in the middle

Conspiracies Loudon Wainwright III

We don't believe in "You know who" But we don't let the kids know it We're parents, who are grown ups There's a line we have to toe it But we're part of a conspiracy About this bearded big fat guy Who

Happy Birthday Elvis Loudon Wainwright III

I heard a cassette of you speaking On a telephone; From a bunker beneath Graceland, The king sits on his throne. Happy birthday, Elvis; Fifty-eight years old today.

Mr. Guilty Loudon Wainwright III

Call me Mr Guilty, Mr Guilty that's my name Without a doubt it's all my fault, I'm the one to blame You say that you're unhappy I do believe it's true Cause I'm the one, the no good bum That did it all

The Untitled Loudon Wainwright III

gonna be sorry that you treated me bad And if there's an after life I'll gloat & I'll be glad Might be a plane crash, or some sort of OD Might be a photograph in my obituary You might see it & you'll cry

Rufus Is A Tit Man Loudon Wainwright III

Rufus is a tI' man Suckin' on hI' mamma's gland Suckin' on the nipple It's a sweeter than the ripple wine. Yes its sweeter than the wine.

Something For Nothing Loudon Wainwright III

twenty to ten So I sharpened a pencil then I wore down its end And now soon you`ll have something to share with your friends It took twenty minutes to write down this song Tune`s public domain but I didn`t

Unrequited To The Nth Degree Loudon Wainwright III

Hey there's going to be a photograph with my obituary You're gonna see it and you'll cry You're gonna wanna wear black Hey I'll be dead but you can bet your life, I'm gonna get you back I'm tired of being

You Never Phone Loudon Wainwright III

Sometimes I wonder ow wow ow wow ow wow What you must think of me My address and phone number must be Misty in your memory This year my birthday came and went No call was made no card was sent But I got the

Underwear Loudon Wainwright III

You know when I know just how much I care When I'm carefully folding your clean underwear I see it's all worth it though sometimes it sure hurts Putting back in the bureau drawer all my t-shirts I find

So Damn Happy Loudon Wainwright III

The sad thing is I'm so damn happy Who'd blame her if she were to slap me The sun should not shine when there's rain I should be in a lot more pain At least I should feel slightly crappy But the sad thing

Smokey Joe's Cafe (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

One day while I was eating beans at Smokey Joe’s Café Sitting digging on the scene at Smokey Joe’s Café A chick came walking through the door that I had never seen before Least I’d never saw her down at

The End Has Begun Loudon Wainwright III

We walk in your footsteps Though I've had my ups and downs And I'll stand in the silence Until I figure it out One might fall and the other will stand And one might give where the other won't bend The

Christmas Morning Loudon Wainwright III

Well the banks & the schools & the post office are closed You can park where you please and you won't get towed The streets are empty & the stores are finally closed It's Christmas morning He got a tie

I Can'T Stand Myself Loudon Wainwright III

I sure can pick 'em Out looking for my next victim Who will that unlucky one be?

Nocturnal Stumblebutt (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

"Well it's 3am, and so I creep Around the house 'cause you're asleep I can't sleep, I gotta smoke I think I left some in my coat No they're not there, but there's a chance I left some in a packet in my

Come A Long Way (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

We've come a long way since we last shook hands Still got a long way to go We couldn't see the flowers since we last shook hands Couldn't see the flowers on account of the snow What did you do with your

T.S.M.N.W.A. Loudon Wainwright III

They spelled my name wrong again With an E between the D and the N Some dope didn't know it should be an O They spelled my name wrong again Why in God's name can't they check It's a pain in the ass and

Kick In The Head Loudon Wainwright III

Well I hear that she told you she'd been shacking up with your best friend And the kick in the head is she said that she wants to again Well they was kissin and huggin and doin it right in your bed Oh

Drinking Song (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

Like widowed women, drunk men weep Like children curled up, drunk men sleep Like a dog, a drunk will crawl around on all fours Be he broke bum or rich rake His dinner be it bread or cake His beverage be the

Dilated to Meet You (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

you'll be a he Maybe you'll arrive today Perhaps tomorrow night We're hoping you won't hurt too much And that you'll be all right Life has a few unpleasantries We may as well confess We suppose you'll cry

1994 Loudon Wainwright III

not talking 501's I don't mean no pair of pants I'm talking about a future Where nothing's left to chance If you'rre dumb, fat, queer, or crazy No one is to blame You've just been dealt a lousy hand In the

Ogm Loudon Wainwright III

The OGM on our machine Began with we're not here now But you went and changed the "we" to "no one" Do you mean us or me?

Bein' A Dad Loudon Wainwright III

Bein' a dad isn't so bad Except that you gotta feed 'em You gotta shoe 'em and clothe 'em And try not to loathe 'em Bug 'em and hug 'em and heed 'em Bein' a dad can sure make you mad Man it even can drive

Tonya's Twirls Loudon Wainwright III

Then it turned out that she smoked and drank and posed practically nude, And she didn't smile all of the time, she got angry, and was crude.

The Acid Song Loudon Wainwright III

Five of us dropped in the girls' room, Psycadilisized insane quintet.

What Are Families For? Loudon Wainwright III

He lights his seventh cigarette "Almost," she says, "it won't be long Look out the window, sing a song" Singing what... what are families for?

I'M Alright Loudon Wainwright III

meet again another time, another place Can't believe it's been so many years We better grab a chair and a couple of beers You're lookin' good in your three piece suit You know I always knew you'd take the

The Picture Loudon Wainwright III

There are pictures on the piano, pictures of the family, Mostly my kids but there's an old Picture of you and me.

The Doctor Loudon Wainwright III

I went to the doctor and the doctor said Son you look older than me and I'm 71 You're falling apart and not living right I went to the doctor and the doctor said Loud, you've got to stop hanging out With

The World Loudon Wainwright III

Oh the world is a terrible place Look at the look on your face It says it all This world's appalling And we ache for outer space 'Cause the world is a terrible place And the world is a crappy old hole

Suddenly It's Christmas Loudon Wainwright III

There's lights and tinsel in the window They're stocking up the shelves. Santa's slaving at the North Pole In his sweatshop full of elves.

Breakfast In Bed Loudon Wainwright III

Well I wake up in the morning And I can't get out of bed You're lying in there with me We stay put instead I grind the beans, squeeze the juice And butter up the toast That takes about an hour Ninety minutes

Down Drinking at the Bar Loudon Wainwright III

Well, I call you up on the phone: nobody's at home. Then I do my usual thing: I let the telephone ring and ring and ring. I'm standing at a phone booth, coping with the ugly truth.

Between Loudon Wainwright III

Between the forest and the ocean lies a lonely strand The ocean is your mother, and the forest Fatherland.

Pretty Good Day Loudon Wainwright III

I slept through the night, I got through to the dawn I flipped a switch and the light went on I got out of bed and I put some clothes on Oh, it's a pretty good day so far I turned the tap, there was cold

Clockwork Chartreuse (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

You got the black belt, I got the gun. Let's team up tonight--have some fun. Let's drink some drinks, find us some fights. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon: it's Saturday night!

Red Guitar (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

Used to have a red guitar until I smashed it one drunk night Smashed it in the classic form as Peter Townsend might I threw it in the fireplace, I left it there awhile Kate, she started crying when she

Tip That Waitress Loudon Wainwright III

the groping hoping you might Come across with a tip and sympathize with her plight Tip that waitress She's getting her masters, supporting her mom Amidst the confusion she remains cool and calm She knows

East Indian Princess (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III

that other life beat And reading magazines, she sits in straightbacked chairs She's got a common welfare, she's got a queen that cares She's got meat on her bones, she doesn't starve at least Not like the

Y2k Loudon Wainwright III

Y2K No it ain't a virus it's just a little glitch It wan't done by some crazy hackin son of a bitch And Sadaam didn't do it, can't blame him No it's a geek with the glasses and the stupid silly grin Billionaire