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Grown Man Loudon Wainwright III You got a grown man for a boyfriend, So you better treat him just like a baby. He's a saint on Sunday, he's a bum on Monday; The rest of the week he's just crazy. Conspiracies Loudon Wainwright III We don't believe in "You know who" But we don't let the kids know it We're parents, who are grown ups There's a line we have to toe it But we're part of a conspiracy About this bearded big fat guy Who Thanksgiving Loudon Wainwright III drink too much wine Lord you know how I get ruthless Let us somehow get through this meal Without that bad old feeling With history and memory And home cooking we're dealing Remind us that we are all grown Rufus Is A Tit Man Loudon Wainwright III Rufus is a tI' man Suckin' on hI' mamma's gland Suckin' on the nipple It's a sweeter than the ripple wine. Yes its sweeter than the wine. The Man Who Couldn'T Cry Loudon Wainwright III There once was a man who just couldn't cry He hadn't cried for years & for years Napalmed babies & the movie 'Love Story', For Over The Hill Loudon Wainwright III Once you were a young man, But now you are old - you're over the hill. And you can't cross the palm of time's hand With silver and gold to make him stand still. A Father And A Son Loudon Wainwright III Boys grow up to be grown men And then men change back into boys again. You're starting up and I'm winding down; Ain't it big enough for us both in this town? What Are Families For? Loudon Wainwright III All grown up, holding your own You fend them off by telephone You keep in touch, it's come to this The furtive hug, suspicious kiss Your sister's ensconced in your life The archetype of an an ex-wife For Men Loudon Wainwright III , the men keep on their coats The women and the children are the ones who must go first And the men who try to save their skins are cowards and are cursed Every man's a captain, men know how to drown Man Smokey Joe's Cafe (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III at Smokey Joe’s Café A chill ran up and down my spine at Smokey Joe’s Café I could smell her sweat perfume, she smiled at me, my heart went boom Everybody in the room at Smokey Joe’s Café They said, "Man The Man Who Couldn't Cry (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III There once was a man who just couldn't cry He hadn't cried for years and for years Napalmed babies and the movie love story For instance could not produce tears As a child he had cried as all children Talking New Bob Dylan Loudon Wainwright III you always do An' what's best is the old stuff still all sounds new Yeah, today is your birthday, have a great one, Bob Bein' the new you is one hell of a job My kid cranked up her boom box to almost grown The Home Stretch Loudon Wainwright III your tongue There`s nothing else that you can do And you`re too old to die young Too many beds too many towns Not much to declare zones London broils and Tuna Melts on dirty microphones While the sound man 4 X 10 Loudon Wainwright III I are history I put up my protective wall it's 4 feet thick and 10 feet tall 10 feet tall and 4 feet thick granite, concrete, steel and brick protection for you, understand the little boy, the inner man Mr. Guilty Loudon Wainwright III I'm so sorry, sorry as a man can be I'm so guilty, this I' my apology You have been a victim, a pawn I' my cruel game I done you wrong, and I strung you along And now I'm full of shame To compensate for Happy Birthday Elvis Loudon Wainwright III Who was that tall fat man They buried in your place? Just another imitator; Plastic surgeons did his face. Happy birthday, Elvis; You still love to ball. Nocturnal Stumblebutt (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III asleep I can't sleep, I gotta smoke I think I left some in my coat No they're not there, but there's a chance I left some in a packet in my pants Bumped into the table, just below the belt If you were a man 1994 Loudon Wainwright III they can get it back on track So you're smart, straight, thin, and sane Abandon what is random Don't you leave it up to luck Why not submit yourself to a little Genetic nip and tuck Yeah we can put a man Bein' A Dad Loudon Wainwright III Bein' a dad isn't so bad Except that you gotta feed 'em You gotta shoe 'em and clothe 'em And try not to loathe 'em Bug 'em and hug 'em and heed 'em Bein' a dad can sure make you mad Man it even can drive Drinking Song (Album Version) Loudon Wainwright III drunk and Drunks are hostile when they're drunk Which drunk it is, it all depends upon When drunks aren't drunk, they thirst for drink And the elephants are grey, not pink And the drink evaporates the man Dead Skunk Loudon Wainwright III of the road Stinkin` to high heaven You got it It`s dead it`s in the middle Dead skunk in the middle Dead skunk in the middle of the road Stinkin` to high heaven All over the road technicolor man The Acid Song Loudon Wainwright III Oh we got to my house in the country In the country man The trees were all throbbing and green Susie was sure she had cancer I was sure I was James Dean We went down the lake to go swimming Come on let's Daughter Loudon Wainwright III Christmas Morning Loudon Wainwright III Y2k Loudon Wainwright III Number One Loudon Wainwright III Inaugural Blues Loudon Wainwright III Pretty Good Day Loudon Wainwright III What Gives Loudon Wainwright III Tonya's Twirls Loudon Wainwright III