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♪
The Excited Southerner At A Job Interview
Adam Sandler
[
Adam
Sandler
:] And now
the
excited
Southerner
has
a
job
interview
. [Man:] So why don't you tell me why you would be an asset to this company.
♪
The Excited Southerner Proposes To A Woman
Adam Sandler
Setting:
A
restaurant with music playing in
the
background] "And now
the
Excited
Southerner
proposes to
a
girl." Girl: "You wanted to ask me something?"
Excited
Southerner
: "Yes, I did.
♪
The Excited Southerner Gets Pulled Over
Adam Sandler
[
Adam
Sandler
:] And now
the
excited
Southerner
gets pulled over by
a
cop. [Cop:] Do you realize how fast you were going sir?
♪
The Excited Southerner Meets Mel Gibson
Adam Sandler
[
Adam
Sandler
:] And now
the
excited
Southerner
gets to meet his favorite film actor, Mel Gibson. [Man:] Mr. Gibson?
♪
The Excited Southerner Orders A Meal
Adam Sandler
Hi, how are you...I was...if you could, tell me, if you...eh,
the
chef salad, if it, does it come, if you come...
a
la carte, if you see
the
...I saw
the
breakfast menu and
the
, and they got
the
, and
♪
What The Hell Happened To Me?
Adam Sandler
I used to ride
a
big wheel. And sell lemonade. Eat popcorn with Grandpa while we watched
a
parade. But now I'm only happy when I'm drinkin' J.D. What
the
hell happened to me?
♪
The Mule Session
Adam Sandler
My girlfriend left me for
a
seven foot Indian My grandma hung herself on
a
tree in
the
Caribbean My sister's on
the
dope and my brother always picks his nose And Daddy's only happy when he's wearing Mama's
♪
Cool Guy 5
Adam Sandler
[Sean pulling up in his car to
a
hooker] [GIRL #5:] Hey, honey. [SEAN:] S'up baby? Looking all smooth, standing on
the
corner
at
3 in
the
morning and shit. You cold, baby?
♪
four years old
Adam Sandler
I'm not in
the
mood To play your games Or sit on your lap You Where's my Yankees drinking glass?
♪
Sid & Alex
Adam Sandler
[telephone rings] I'll be up in
a
few! Hello? Hey, Sid, it's Alex. Just callin to wish ya
a
happy birthday, man. Alex, Alex, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you for remembering, thank you.
♪
The Goat
Adam Sandler
I am
a
simple goat I live on
the
back of
a
pick-up truck
The
Old Man tied me here with
a
3-foot rope Am I happy he don't give
a
fuck He's filled with anger, and filled with rage And tells me I smell
♪
the lonesome kicker
Adam Sandler
Me, I'm
the
Lonesome Kicker Extra points, field goals
at
your service One might think it comes with glory You might think different after you listen to my story My helmet is equipped with
a
tiny
♪
The Lonesome Kicker (Album Version)
Adam Sandler
Me, i'm
the
lonesome kicker Extra points, field goals
at
your service One might think it comes with glory You might think different after you listen to my story My helmet is equipped with
a
tiny face
♪
The Goat Song (Album Version)
Adam Sandler
The
Goat Song I am
a
simple goat I live on
the
back of
a
pick-up truck
The
Old Man tied me here with
a
3-foot rope Am I happy he don't give
a
fuck He's filled with anger, and filled with rage And
♪
the goat song
Adam Sandler
I am
a
simple goat I live on
the
back of
a
pick-up truck
The
Old Man tied me here with
a
3-foot rope Am I happy he don't give
a
fuck He's filled with anger, and filled with rage And tells me I
♪
Crazy Love
Adam Sandler
a
pair of scissors
a
long time ago (ha-ha-ha) [
Adam
:] And you don't care that I collect dead animals from
the
side of
the
road then pretend they're alive and think I'm
a
famous football player [Lisa:]
♪
Whitey
Adam Sandler
Whitey: Oh they day cant begin Till
the
gard lets me in Then I walk for some exersise In less then
a
snap I complete my daily lap Then it's time to SOCILIZE I see Raidy and Ruth
at
the
Information Booth
♪
Pibb Tries The Skateboarding
Adam Sandler
Snug as
a
bug in
a
rug playin Dig Dug, my friend! Uh huh... I'm all set to give this skitchboard
a
whirl! Okay, we should really put
a
helmet on you first...
♪
at a medium place
Adam Sandler
Put your arms around me baby Can't you see I need you so Hold me close against your skin I'm about to begin Lovin' you Spit on your hand and stroke my cock
At
a
medium pace Play with my balls
♪
At a Medium Pace
Adam Sandler
Spit on your hand and stroke my cock
at
a
medium pace. Play with my balls and tell me how big they are. Honey rub your beaver up and down my face.
♪
Calling Home
Adam Sandler
I'm okay
at
basketball... baseball was more my thing.... Well, uh, I think they have
a
pickup game goin on
at
10 AM tomorrow morning in
the
main gym for us freshmen You playin?
♪
Oh Mom...
Adam Sandler
Silverware clicking] M1: "Can you pass
the
beats please?" F1: "Here you go" M1: "Thanks" Brad: "Hey Mom, guess what? I got invited to
a
party tonight! And I'm gonna go if that's ok with you."
♪
The Adventures Of The Cow
Adam Sandler
And now
a
cow
at
bat in
the
bottom of
the
6th inning of
a
little league game getting hit by
a
pitch" [Baseball sounds and cow bell ringing,ball is hit and hits cow] [Cow:] Moo "And now
a
cow who goes skydiving
♪
The Champion
Adam Sandler
she about to fall from grace In
the
land of
the
rising sun shadows are falling again
The
die is cast,
the
future and past coming to her
at
last Oh, oh, oh All she needed was
a
Champion Oh, oh, oh Crying
♪
Dee Wee (My Friend The Massive Idiot)
Adam Sandler
He said he'd be here
at
seven
The
clock just hit 7:22 It's too cold outside To wait for my ride Watching mama try out
a
new doo (Bruins) He said he'd be here
at
seven But it just hit 7:35 (already?)
♪
The Buffoon and the Dean of Admissions
Adam Sandler
And now
a
buffoon's meeting with
the
dean of admissions
at
a
prestigious college."
♪
The Peeper
Adam Sandler
The
peeper,
The
peeper, Whats going through his head? Whoah! Climbing
the
tree. Slowly, quietly, Looking for next branch. Found it, got it. Window height, great view. Settlin' in, keepin it quiet.
♪
steve polychronopolous
Adam Sandler
- "Polychronopolous" I'm
a
big fuckin' dick I'm
a
pain in your ass I drink all your beer I'll eat
the
last slice I'll give you charley horses I'll pull your shorts down
at
the
beach I always
♪
Sweet Beatrice
Adam Sandler
Hangin' with my sweet amour She came out with
a
lion's roar Yellin' "I'm goin' to
the
corner store," Be back
at
quarter to four "Don't slam you pinkies in
the
drawer" She can be like
a
maiden from
♪
sweat beatrice
Adam Sandler
Hanging with my sweet amour She came out with
a
lion's roar Yelling, "I'm going to
the
corner store, Be back
at
quarter to four" "Don't slam your pinkies in
the
drawer" She can be like
a
maiden
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