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7 Foot Man (Live) Adam Sandler We just wrote this song on the bus the other day so just sit back and relax I'm the 7 foot man, I've commited no crime, Bumping my head into doorways, It happens all the time, I'm 7 feet tall, And I repeat The Goat Adam Sandler I am a simple goat I live on the back of a pick-up truck The Old Man tied me here with a 3-foot rope Am I happy he don't give a fuck He's filled with anger, and filled with rage And tells me I smell the goat song Adam Sandler I am a simple goat I live on the back of a pick-up truck The Old Man tied me here with a 3-foot rope Am I happy he don't give a fuck He's filled with anger, and filled with rage And tells me I The Goat Song (Album Version) Adam Sandler The Goat Song I am a simple goat I live on the back of a pick-up truck The Old Man tied me here with a 3-foot rope Am I happy he don't give a fuck He's filled with anger, and filled with rage And the lonesome kicker Adam Sandler But that's the life I live The Lonesome Kicker Kickoffs can be so very scary Especially, if the returner breaks on through And I'm the only guy on the playing field left to tackle him I don't want The Lonesome Kicker (Album Version) Adam Sandler But that's the life i live The lonesome kicker Kickoffs can be so very scary Especially, if the returner breaks on through And i'm the only guy on the playing field left to tackle him I don't want Gay Robot Adam Sandler [whirring, beeping noises] Says here, due to injuries and irratic weather patterns, the Eagles will finish a dismal 7-9 What? No way! Dee Wee (My Friend The Massive Idiot) Adam Sandler He said he'd be here at seven The clock just hit 7:22 It's too cold outside To wait for my ride Watching mama try out a new doo (Bruins) He said he'd be here at seven But it just hit 7:35 (already?) The Mule Session Adam Sandler My girlfriend left me for a seven foot Indian My grandma hung herself on a tree in the Caribbean My sister's on the dope and my brother always picks his nose And Daddy's only happy when he's wearing Mama's Sex Or Weight Lifting Adam Sandler [Man:] Hi, how ya doin'? My name's Gregory Miner. [Adam Sandler:] Oh terrific. My name's Barry Lakin. [Man:] Uh huh [Adam Sandler:] And let me tell you what I did man. Inner Voice Adam Sandler weeks of vacation a year If people piss me off I can make 'em disappear Every time I sneeze I get a feature on the news The reporter says "gesundheit" and hilarity ensues And how did I get to be the man The Excited Southerner Gets Pulled Over Adam Sandler [Adam Sandler:] And now the excited Southerner gets pulled over by a cop. [Cop:] Do you realize how fast you were going sir? The Longest Pee Adam Sandler Line of people talking] "Hey man, let me in there first" -"Go ahead man, take it easy" "Thanks, I really gotta pee" [Open door, close door] [Unzip pants] [Start pissin..........groaning....] Joining The Cult Adam Sandler Sounds of Basketball being shot around] Sandler: "Hey man, I'm joining a religious cult." Allen: "Now, that's ridiculous." Sandler: "Well, I'm joining it, so you gotta sign up too." I'm so Wasted Adam Sandler [M2:] "I'm so wasted, man." [Joe:] "Yeah, you are, oh ho ho!" [M2:] "Thanks man." [Joe:] "It's good party, huh?" [M2:] "Oh, it's great man." [Joe:] "Hey that's some good acid, huh?" The Chanukah Song Part II (Live) Adam Sandler Creepin' On The Mayor Adam Sandler [Man] Okay, baby [Woman] Man, they stink! That baby couldn't stop shittin today! [Man] I know, baby I don't care, baby shit don't mean nothin cause I'm safe and sound! The Buffoon and the Dean of Admissions Adam Sandler Buffoon: "I got a snake, man!" Dean: "Yes, pets are welcome here on campus. Be it the traditional dog, or cat, or even the occasional reptile." Buffoon: "One time I fed it some beer man! moyda Adam Sandler nice to his neighbors You can count on him to buy your school candy bars He's a real nic guy He's always got the jumper cables He'll take your mail in when you're on vacation He's a good-hearted man The Excited Southerner At A Job Interview Adam Sandler [Adam Sandler:] And now the excited Southerner has a job interview. [Man:] So why don't you tell me why you would be an asset to this company. Pibb Goes Surfing Adam Sandler Yeah, man! Way to go Pibb! I'm speedin along here! [different man] Hey, old man, you better pull out before you hit that reef! Well, thanks, amigo, but I didn't come out here for no six second ride! Sid & Alex Adam Sandler Just callin to wish ya a happy birthday, man. Alex, Alex, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you for remembering, thank you. My pleasure. Did you do anything fun today? Nothing special. The Excited Southerner Meets Mel Gibson Adam Sandler [Adam Sandler:] And now the excited Southerner gets to meet his favorite film actor, Mel Gibson. [Man:] Mr. Gibson? Sweet Beatrice Adam Sandler She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice She's my sweet Beatrice And she's coming home Well, for sure, she opened the door Whipped out a three-foot fishing lure Sexually, that made me feel Calling Home Adam Sandler (background) Man: Hey, hey, hey! Mr. College! Woman:Who's on the phone? Mom:Tyler, mom! Other Man:Let me talk to the superstar! Mom: Okay, here's your brother! Other Man:Thanks, mumsy... the beating of a high school bus driver Adam Sandler "Uhh, young man. Can I help you? Can I see your bus pass, please?" [Beating sounds] "Sir, please!" [Beating sounds] "I drive with that hand!" [Beating sounds] "Children! Call for help!" fatty mcgee Adam Sandler Murphy is such a pain, man." M2: "We just had a test a week ago. Now we gotta take another one tommorrow. This sucks!" M1: "And it counts for 80 percent of our grade." Memory Lane Adam Sandler of the car] [M4:] "Hey, screw you guys I am who I am deal with it" [M1:] "I'm glad we got rid of him his was a wierdo" [M3:] "Oh my God, that was a little out there, hey check out a water slide, man Cool Guy 5 Adam Sandler [GIRL #5:] Well, how much you got, big man? [SEAN:] Well, I'm willing to drop 50 dollars on your ass, but there's a condition going on. [GIRL #5:] What's that? Teenage Love on the Phone Adam Sandler [Hands phone to guy] Richie: "Hey man! What the hell are you doing there!? Samantha's my girl! You'd better stay away from her or I'll make you wish you were never born!" Buffoon: "Fuckin' shit!"